Misplaced Moments of a Lifetime

Remember the good ole days?

When the activities of the youth were limited to one after school event,& vacations were to the local state park to take in the sights. Even the thrill of staying in a motel was an event in itself as we stopped the travels in mid-afternoon so we could spend family time in the pool. Then we would dress for dinner at the Howard Johnsons buffet.

These days have been overshadowed by the glitz & rah-rah of expectation & never being satisfied with the simple things of living. As we grow older, we reflect back on these times. Often we are not happy with the transitions. We see our lives moving too fast & time invested in the life of another has diminished, if not almost nonexistent. We place our loved ones, who are now no longer independent, in the care of a stranger or in a home that is not their own.

Then we rarely visit or call. We are too busy. When we invite time to be the enemy we fall victim to the theft of memories we cannot hold on to. We cast blame on the government, the schools, & even the church whether they are a part of the issue or not. Could it be that we are too busy to notice where the blame really is hiding? Take a look in the mirror.

Let’s propose a challenge. Make three appointments to keep for one month; each week no matter what. Make a date with the people in your life that matter the most: one with yourself, one with your spouse or best friend, & one with your parents and children if you are a parent. Rearrange your priorities for a month. Say no to intruding interruptions of your sleep, relaxation, recreation, & quiet times. Turn off the TV, the computer, & stop playing with the phone, apps, & texting. For this time - Just STOP the unnecessary distractions in your Life. Interesting how the word 'NO' is becoming less spoken to children, young adults, and even to ourselves when wanting (not needing) the most recent 'toy' whether it be electronics, or automotive.

We have placed ourselves outside our 'comfort' zone & grown numb to our self imposed debt, disrespect, & delusion of what we can afford physically, financially, emotionally, & economically. “Life was simpler when we were children.” Each generation states that fact as they mature & become dishearten by the following generations. We either ‘remember when’ or we will ‘regret then’. Think about it.

When I was a youth, a box of crayons & building blocks were our iPod. Two cans & a string were our cell phones. It was a soapbox derby that was our car & listening to bedtime stories, our wide screen imagination.

I am blessed to have been a participant in the era I grew up in. Imagine the inner thoughts & memories that your parents who are in their 60-90s must cherish. They have seen so very much. I am blessed to have a strong family & values.

God knows the heart & in my heart are moments of gratitude. We need never take anyone or anything for granted. Memories are to be cherished...not misplaced or replaced. Start today to create your memories of 'remember when' Yes,regret is a choice.

Cut The Apron String- Yubw8n?

Disrespectful Drama

I am not a parent...but I can spot things that apparently
go un-addressed by those who wish NOT to see. Let me explain one example...bear with me~

I have come to the conclusion that I have little tolerance for children who are blatantly inconsiderate & disrespectful to others. This is really apparent when these ‘children’ are adults who take advantage of their parents, peers, provisions, & privileges. When these children continue to suck long & hard on that silver spoon that apparently has been left in their mouth for way too long, this parental error in judgment is only going to enhance any flaw in their child's character, personal pursuits & overall ambition.
When is the apron sting to be cut & by which party…the child or the parent? Someone please ~ give these type of people the ‘grow up & be independent’ scissors.

Stop explaining your actions or lack of, & let go!
Most parents in this situation probably are not anticipating grandchildren. Afterall, who would want to raise both the husband/father & the children? Think about it. The boy can’t even take care of himself at this stage of the game. He still lives at home! The independent gene is not working yet. Why should it...everything is given to him & what's worse ~ it is silently expected to be. So who is to blame here? For whatever the unexplained reason, the drama continues to go undisciplined, unacknowledged, unresolved, & inexcusable. Take a moment, step back ~ look closely at this real life version of the movie: "Failure to Launch" an adult male who overstayed his life at home with his mommy & daddy. Really? Yeah, this happens in real life too.

Folks...this drama is played out every day in our society. Parental abandonment issues grip tightly to the 'Do it for me' offspring & the circle is complete. But who is responsible for letting go~ the adult parents or the adult child? You would think that it would be a mutual want for both. Not always the case. Parents ~How can you enjoy having your child home for the holidays if he's never left? When should parents stop 'giving in'just so he won't leave? It is a fact of everyone's life ~ Growing pains are beneficial. But you have to be willing to let go to become close as adults. Take the role you are given. Be the parent. Be the adult child. Step in to the next stage of your life. You will enjoy it.

My last comment would be pretty blunt: Hello ~ little mama's boy ~ grow a pair! Take that spoon out of your mouth & move on with your adult self! Ask yourself what everyone wants to ask you...Yubw8n?

**Please note ~ any injury or improvement to your parent-child relationship due to the nature of this blog is purely unintentional. (LOL)

"I Love You Even When...."

Having just overheard a mother speak in a demeaning manner while she reprimanded her adult child in a public setting, I believe this story needs to be shared. Fortunately, the daughter proved wise and respectful in this scenario. She looked at her mother, said “Mom, I love you even when…”

What a shame that this kind of scene is more common than not. Although, in most situations, the calmness of the daughter’s reply is not as prevalent. Most of the responses are wrapped in anger and defensiveness at having been publicly reprimanded as the duties of parenthood were over scripted so they could be ‘heard’ in an authoritative role.

I remember a presentation regarding these familiar Bible verses: “Children, Obey your parents… (Ephesians 6:1) Parents/Fathers, don’t exasperate your children... (Colossians 3:21)”
When you are a ‘child’ you obey or you will be disciplined. And as a parent you teach right and wrong by example and with mutual respect to your child. As maturity in years evolves, the adult is no longer 'the child' and possibly a parent as well. Then it becomes obedience in the form of respect…from both.

Parents...never step on the emotions of your children to exercise your parental platform. And as an adult child,always show respect for the authority God has placed in your life. Each will give an account for their actions & responses to these actions. Love gently as you encourage and edify. Never embarrass another in order to be right.
For should you make it a practice to loudly exercise your parental authority in public, don’t be surprised if your adult child walks away from the situation and sadly even the relationship.

With all due respect, whether you are the parent or the adult child, would you stand there and have someone who says they love you speak to you in that manner? Maybe you are uncomfortable with the story I just shared. Maybe it hits too close to home. Maybe that parent is you. Or maybe you are that child who is also the adult ~ wondering why.

People~Life is so precious.Resolve your conflict of hearts.

Be loving. Ask yourself~Yubw8n?